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Me, Myself and I



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When I first got elected and was handed a motion to move, then had to make the announcement at the table, I wondered, is it moved by me or by myself?

Well, as any maven of English can tell you, it's ME.*

When you talk about yourself as the subject of a sentence, you use the nominative or subjective pronoun "I" as in I am going, I am moving, I am reading and so on. Me is the objective form of that pronoun. As in, "That belongs to me," or "She was coming to see me," or "This motion is moved by me."

But many people mistakenly think of "me" as lowly or coarse, and substitute I where it is inappropriate. They say, 'The resolution was approved by both the mayor and I,' when the correct pronoun is me: 'The resolution was approved by both the mayor and me.'

It's like the word between: it takes the objective form of the pronoun. Nothing can get between you and I, but it can be found between you and me. Nothing lowly or coarse there.**

Some people incorrectly substitute the reflexive pronoun 'myself' for me or even I: ''The resolution was approved by both the mayor and myself,' and "This motion is moved by myself and Councillor Chadwick." Both, of course, are incorrect.

The rule for using the reflexive form is simple: "Use myself only when you have used I earlier in the same sentence, as in: 'I am not a particularly skilled ukulele player, myself'."

Myself should never be used as a substitute for me or I in a sentence in which it is the only personal pronoun. So "I sent it to myself" is fine, but not "please send it to myself" because in the latter there is no other pronoun to balance 'myself'. It's reflexive: it needs to refer back to something (I or me). You wouldn't say "Myself moved this motion..."

The pronoun "me" should also be used when someone else will perform the action to, or for, you. So you don't say, "If you have questions, please call Chadwick or myself," and never "If you have questions, please call Chadwick or I." No, you should say, "If you have questions, please call Chadwick or me." If you take Chadwick out of the equation, then it's clear: "If you have questions, please call me." You wouldn't say "please call I" or "please call myself."

Here are some examples of using 'myself' properly. In every case myself refers back to another pronoun (I):
  • I prepared it myself.
  • I saw myself in the mirror.
  • I consider myself fortunate.
  • I, myself, haven�t had that problem, but I know someone who has.
  • They asked whether I, myself, had ever encountered that particular problem.
Here are some examples showing where it isn't appropriate because the other pronoun is missing:
  • It was good for the staff and myself (No: you should say the staff and me).
  • He gave the motion to him and myself (No: he gave it to him and me).
  • She and myself are going to the meeting. (No: She and I are going).

So: a motion can be moved by ME, bu NOT moved by myself. You CAN say "I moved it myself," although it sounds stuffy and contrived. You can also say, "I moved and Councillor So-and-so seconded," which puts it in the active voice, rather than the passive. But you should never, ever say "moved by myself."

In case you missed it, March 4 was National Grammar Day.
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* Yes: 'it's' is correct here because that is a contraction of it is. The possessive version is without the apostrophe: 'its'. As it "its size is too small' or 'its height is too low.' I get irate seeing "it's" used as a possessive in Powerpoint slides. Or those unnecessary apostrophes in dates - 1960's and 1980's - that makes it possessive, not plural! Write 1960s and 1980s, no apostrophe.
** The plural of me is us and the plural of myself is ourselves. 'It was approved by us,' is correct (objective form, plural). So is 'We approved it' (subjective form, plural). But 'It was approved by ourselves' is incorrect. You could say, "We approved it ourselves' because the reflexive 'ourselves' now has an anchoring subjective pronoun to refer back to. 'It was approved by we three' is incorrect because the verb requires the objective pronoun here. The proper form is 'It was approved by us three.' Drop the 'three' and see how it reads.
You can say "This was a motion that we councillors approved Monday with great delight," because 'we councillors' is the subject of the sentence. To use 'us' you need to turn the sentence around and put the pronoun in the proper, objective place: "It was a motion that was delightfully moved by us councillors." In the former, however, you could easily be referring to just some of council or all depending on the situation, but in the latter it is unclear if the us refers to all or a portion of council and to my mind suggests all.
How about this one? "I believe that, for the most part, us small urban communities are the backbone of the province." Or do you prefer, "I believe that, for the most part, we small urban communities are the backbone of the province." Yes - we, because it's part of the subject (remove 'small urban communities' and see how it reads).
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The mistake that always annoys me is the merging of 'you are' into 'your' rather than 'you're'. I don't know why it annoys me so much. Maybe because it is such a simple thing to get right. It involves none of the complexities you discuss above, so there are really no excuses for getting it wrong.
I can only imagine how you would react to 'youse'...

I tells ya, there are some days my head would verily explode with the mangalations of the Engrish language that I hafta deals with at the Page Factory...
[indent]Another of my pet peeves is the common abuse of the word unique. In the latest edition of the LCBO's Food & Drink magazine, there's an "advertorial' that has the headline, "An Exceptionally Unique Region." It also opens with the line, "If it is young, it is unique." Both statements are editorial chunder. So is the later assertion that the wines are "...offering unique experiences of tasting and socializing."

Unique is a standalone word that brooks no qualifiers. A thing is either unique or it is not. It is an absolute, not a relative condition, like pregnant. One can be no more "a little pregnant" than one can be "exceptionally unique." One is either unique - or pregnant - or not. And none of this blather about we're all unique in our own way. That sort of usage to justify its abuse merely waters down the value of such a powerful word.

Simply being young offers no such quality. Different perhaps, special perhaps, exotic, enchanting and a whole host of adjectives perhaps. But unique is unique alone, and can't be very unique, somewhat unique, a little unique, or exceptionally unique. To abuse unique is to expose the paucity of one's linguistic skills.

A really good book to read on the subject is Lynn Truss' excellent Eats, Shoots and Leaves. It's both entertaining and informative, but best of all, she's righteously angry over the abuses - punctuation, grammar, spelling and style and she lets loose with her figurative cannons over them. It should be required reading in schools - and for everyone online.

She has a similar book out on the abysmal state of manners in today's world - Talk to the Hand - that is equally humorous, but is also saddening because it shines light on the decay of social mores in our culture.

Both are highly recommended. There are also several really good blogs about grammar, among them Bill Walsh's biting attacks. You can find several links to others on the National Grammar Day website.

As I wrote in response to a question posted on another forum (titled "dnt noe what strings to get help plz"), "Language is a tool, just like your ukulele, and deserves the same respect. Use it properly, not like a broken toy. Used well, language is like a scalpel or an artist's brush, capable of great subtlety and expression. Used poorly... it's the lazy scrawl we see here."
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I'm with you on the abuse of unique. The same thiing happens with the word favorite (this is my most favorite blog).
Other much-abused verbage I deal with on an almost daily basis: ironically (I don't know how many times I change that to the more appropriate 'coincidentally'); impacted (since when was impact a verb? I'm always changing it to 'affect' or affected'); greater as an adjective (one I had today - 'of greater significance')...

Then there are always the interesting turns of phrase. One of my favourites was one writer, in describing a hardy variety of grape, stated it could survive in temperatures of "up to" -35C.

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